The Aardvark Speaks : essence, effervescence, obscurity. Established 2002. A weblog by Horst Prillinger. ISSN 1726-5320

May 2007 Archive

May 01, 2007

On Saturday, as I rode my bicycle to work, I witnessed another person on a bicycle, as we call it, "descend over the handlebars". I knew this was something that could happen if you applied only the front brakes, but until then I had never actually seen it happen. It was fascinating in a strange way, and slightly frightening. The person did not seem to be very hurt; lucky he was wearing a helmet.

I then encountered one of those motorcyclists on one of those extra large motorbikes on which they are sitting with their legs spread widely in such a way that you don't know whether there's no other way of sitting on these things, or whether it's a kind of covert sexual harassment.

At any rate he was wearing one of those crash helmets that people on such motorbikes usually wear, the kind that looks like a chamber pot without a handle. It also looks somewhat like a Wehrmacht helmet, but really more like a chamber pot without a handle. It also looks as if it could withstand a ricocheting bullet from an assault rifle, but not really the effects of a motorcycle crash. I wonder if those helmets are legal or if the police just don't say anything because they feel threatened by the sexually implicit pose of the rider on the motorbike.

Nothing serious happened until much later, when I closed a window and the glass pane broke right there and then, without any intervention on my part. It cut my left hand, not seriously, but enough to bleed a bit.

Then on my way home my rear tyre got caught in a tramway rail as I was crossing it. No idea why and how this happened, as the angle should have been safe. With an extreme amount of luck I managed to get out of the rail without falling off the bike, only slightly dislocating the seat in the process.

I had had plans to go inline skating later that day, which I postponed because I felt like I had been close to enough near accidents that day.

Yesterday morning I had a strange dream about a minor train accident in which a defective railway carriage became uncoupled from a train, coasted on at some distance after the train from which it had been uncoupled, and then crashed into the train at low speed when the train stopped, causing some, but not much damage, and causing no injuries (this is, by the way, technically impossible, because any carriage becoming uncoupled causes the immediate application of the brakes on both the train and the carriage itself). A few hours later I read in an online newspaper that earlier that day there had been a minor train accident at one of Vienna's railway stations when they had tried to uncouple a defective carriage from a train and collided with a shunting engine in the process.

It would be really helpful if these omens and visions occurred in such a way that it would be easy to determine whether I am a psychic of some sort or whether all of this is just coincidence. As it is, I remain totally clueless.

Posted by Horst at 08:10 PM | Comments (5)

May 03, 2007

The trumpet that Robert Bachner lent me is, at this stage, emitting two sounds when I blow into it. I'm convinced it was designed to emit more than two sounds, especially as Robert, when blowing into it himself, produced what seemed to be a myriad of sounds, but in my present stage of not yet having started to take trumpet lessons and therefore not practising because (for lack of lessons) I do not yet know what exactly to practise, all I get out of it is two sounds.

And assorted noises, but I guess these do not qualify as music. Nor do my two sounds I guess, but they somehw seem closer to the concept of music. After all, given the required dexterity, by pressing the valves two sounds can be multiplied into several.

What really matters for trumpet playing though is strong lips. It's quite amazing how many muscles are involved in moving your lips (assuming this wikipedia article is correct), and it seems that for playing a brass instrument, all of them must be well trained and strong.

Now all I need to find is a fitness club where they have adapted these machines that you normally use to strengthen your biceps so that you can work on your zygomaticus major instead. I'm sure that once I'm able to lift a 16-ton weight with my levator labii superioris alaeque nasi I will also be a virtuoso trumpet player.

Probably with a rather disturbing expression on my face, but I guess that's the price you have to pay.

Posted by Horst at 08:34 AM | Comments (8)

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